Adultery

Adultery is a crime in many jurisdictions, although it is rarely prosecuted. The Pope Francis has declared on 9^th Dec'2021 that the sin of adultery is not the most serious of sins. Adultery is not be a criminal offence. It is only a ground for divorce. What two consenting adults do in their bedrooms is not something they should be sent to jail for. It is not the business of the state. Many couples overcome cheating. Affairs usually end in divorce and remarriage, or divorce and relationship loss, or the recommitment to the relationship that was betrayed. Living with another person during the existence of current relationship is a ground for seeking divorce. Dating is not adultery. If you have to question, ‘Is this cheating?’ it is probably cheating. Under most laws, the married participant is an adulterer and the single one merely a fornicator.

Adultery and its consequences

Adultery is one of the worst things that can happen to a marriage and demolishes everything you’ve built with your partner in such a personal way. Infidelity can feel like a death of trust, the death of affection, the death of all the work you’ve done in your marriage. The fatal blow to any marriage is an adulterous affair where one or both spouses think they finally found their soul mate. Once convinced that he or she married the wrong person, the idea of divorce can take root and grow. Blinded by the deception of the affair, most people have no idea how they got there, and don’t know how to get out. There’s no doubt that adultery affects marriages in the worst way. 

• Cheating is one of the easiest ways to damage a relationship. It shatters trust.
• Guilt and shame are big components of adultery for both who cheat and for the wounded spouse.
• When infidelity is discovered in a marriage, it is a black mark, embarrassment and shame for the cheating spouse and even  more for the wounded spouse.
• The wounded spouse wants to shrink, wants to hide and indeed feels as if he or she is tainted. The persistent negative thoughts can make life constricted.
• A fatal consequence of adultery is broken trust and loss of intimacy. An entangled affair is always the result of an intimacy deficit in the marital relationship. 
• Part of the lure of the affair for an unfaithful spouse was the opportunity to be himself or herself. They desperately needed that freedom to be themselves, to be accepted and appreciated. 
• Cheating may not always end in divorce but it can have a devastating impact. About 60% of men and 40% has extramarital affair at some point during their married life. The depth of betrayal and emotional pain that often leads to divorce after infidelity. 
• Negative emotions are hard to put behind but will eventually fade and life will become normal again. For that to happen, you need to divorce and that is exactly how most people deal with infidelity in their marriages.
• Infidelity is lonely and isolating. If you’re unfaithful, you don’t want to tell anyone for fear of being labeled bad. If you’ve been betrayed you also don’t want to tell anyone for fear of the pity or the sense of shame and the unsolicited advice. 
• It’s also hard to find a safe place or group of people you can talk to and not be told what you should do or how you should feel.
• On top of the dangers of being exposed to different sexually transmitted diseases when a partner cheats can occur.
• Being cheated on can make you feel awful, but also ill. Infidelity can lead to illness. Infidelity can develop mental illness and can also have consequences for a person’s physical health.
• The discovery of a partner’s infidelity can be a psychologically traumatic and can trigger post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) that can lead to depression, suicidal thoughts, anxiety and even flashbacks to the discovery. 
• Adultery may mean that you have to start all over again within or outside of the marriage. After years of marriage, discovering the affair can destroy you. Friends may disappear that leads you to isolation. It feels like everything you’ve worked hard for is destroyed. 
• Even if you choose to stay together, it will never be the same again. The pain gets less intense but the mind never seems to rest. Somewhere inside you have to find renewed strength to begin to redefine yourself all over again. 

Cheating can collapse even the strongest bonds and is especially dangerous because it has the power to implode your relationship. Don’t cheat on your spouse, unless you’re ready for some major consequences.

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Adultery & Stability of marriage

The Centre’s affidavit demands the dismissal of the petition, asserting that Section 497 “supports, safeguards and protects the institution of marriage. It is submitted that striking down section 497 of IPC and Section 198(2) Cr.P.C. will prove to be detrimental to the intrinsic Indian ethos which gives paramount importance to the institution and sanctity of marriage. The provisions of law under challenge in the present writ have been specifically created by the legislature in its wisdom, to protect and safeguard the sanctity of marriage, keeping in mind the unique structure and culture of the Indian society.” 

A three-judge bench of the Supreme Court headed by then Chief Justice YV Chandrachud had,  on  May 27, 1985, upheld the constitutionality of the provision. Three decades later, his son, Justice DY Chandrachud opined during the admission of the case that the wife cannot be treated as a commodity by leaving her at the discretion of her husband to give consent to the act. 

The Bench headed by the CJI Dipak Misra observed that the provision seems archaic in view of the societal progress made so far. The bench is therefore set to consider whether earlier judgments, which had upheld the provision, are to be reconsidered, in view of the social progression, perceptual shift, gender equality and gender sensitivity. The government agreed to the thought that "stability of a marriage is not an ideal to be scorned". The Constitution Bench, to be headed by the CJI, may consider whether Section 497 would treat the man as the adulterer and the married woman as a victim. The larger Bench may also examine why the offence of adultery ceases the moment it is established that the husband connived or consented to the adulterous act. The petition challenges the validity of Section 198 (1) and (2) of the Code of Criminal Procedure, which deems that only a husband can be an aggrieved party in offences against marriage like adultery and only he can go to court.　　　

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The decriminalization of adultery might result in weakening the sanctity and laxity of a marital bond, but the individual rights of women are paramount. Section 497 attempts to safeguard the institution of marriage at the expense of women's liberty & rights. The responsibility of marriage has to borne by husband and wife equally. Adultery is no crime. While man & woman can do what ever they want in this free world, the adultery by one must automatically must give the other -- right to demand divorce without prejudice to alimony rights & obligations.

Islam: Adultery, Polygamy and Talaq

• Islam allows a sex explicitly between a Muslim man and his slaves. And also requires the execution of consenting adults participating in "illegal" sexual intercourse.
• Islamic law (Sharia) requires that adulterers be put to death.  Women are executed far more often, since they are presumed to bear the burden of sexual responsibility. Rape victims are sometimes convicted if they speak out. Under Sharia law if four male witnesses cannot be found to confirm the victim's rape claim, reporting a rape means a confession of adultery.
• A Muslim man can marry as many as four women and have sexual relations with an unspecified number of slaves as well. 

Quran: 4. Sura An-Nisa' (The Women)

• Anytime a wife is not menstruating, a Muslim man may divorce his wife by saying, "I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you," effectively throwing her out on the street and leaving him free to obtain a new wife. It is a controversial practice called the talaq or "triple-talaq."
• A disobedient wife can be replaced. A man can only have up to four wives, but he can rotate as many women as he pleases in and out of the lineup.
• Under Islamic law, once a marriage is consummated, a wife has no right to divorce her husband without his permission, even though she may be cast out at will for any reason. Some Islamic scholars believe that it isn't right to do this in one sitting. They say that there should be a period of time between the "three strikes."
• Women's rights groups in the Muslim world are waging an uphill battle to prevent governments from recognizing the triple talaq - with some success in the more moderate countries; however, it will always be honored by Islamic courts.
• The truth is that Islam is not a religion of peace and it is not like other religion. Sometimes the truth isn't comfortable. Sometimes the truth offends.  But it is far better that we offend others than lose our children's future.
• Islamic law is absolutely incompatible with true democracy. It is a theocratic system with Allah alone at its head. Allah's law is interpreted by a ruling body of clerics. There is no room for a secular political system in which all people are treated as equals.
• Democracy is a man-made system, meaning rule by the people of the people. In Islam, rule is for Allah and it is not permissible to give legislative rights to any human being. Democracy is at war with Islam and its followers, effectively sanctioning violence for the cause of Sharia. Democracy, freedom, and human rights have no place in Islam.
• The Quran is full of direct and indirect, implicit and many times explicit indications that show that the establishment of the Islamic order is a requirement on Muslims whenever possible. If a Muslim believes that there is any human being who has the right to make laws other than Allah then obviously this is total divergence from the path of Islam. Or any person who believes that secularism is superior to the law of Allah, he's violating the basic Quranic tenets.
• True Islam permits neither elections, nor democracy.
• Islam is not simply a belief about God.  Islam is a word that means submission.  Islam is a set of rules that define a social hierarchy in which Muslims submit to Allah, women submit to men and all non-Muslims submit to Islamic rule.  
• Don't judge Islam by the Muslims that you know, and don't judge the Muslims that you know by Islam.
• It's far easier to act as if critics of Islam have a problem with Muslims as people than it is to accept the uncomfortable truth that Islam is different.
• The Western world has decided that polygamy devalues a woman's worth. In Islam, however, a woman's worth is often the sum of her sexual value to her husband.

To know more of Islam, Quran & Muslims visit https://www.thereligionofpeace.com/

My View:

Islam has many aberrations, in today's civilized context which many educated Muslims agree in private. Islam was best religion in the circumstances of 16+ centuries ago. But fundamentalist Muslims taking shelter under distortions of Islamic provisions for all their fanatic attitudes, is totally unacceptable. Today almost entire world is democratic with secularism, equality, merit and human rights as guiding spirit. But Islam in conflict with these principles. The present practices by Muslims in the name Islam namely Polygamy, Women submission, Barbaric punishments, disregard to democracy, secularism etc are not only unacceptable but also condemnable.

Muslim man divorcing wife by pronouncing "Talaq" thrice is unlawful and unacceptable in a civilized society. Marriage is sacred and divorce could only be granted by learned judge after careful examination and after ascertaining reconciliation unfeasible, after some cooling period of six months. Instant divorcing is atrocious especially when it is allowed for Muslim men and prohibited for Muslim women.

India, a pluralist nation, has a constitution with secularism, equality, merit etc as its guiding principles. And Muslims in India must respect and comply with these provisions like all other religions and races in the country. In matters of public life, enforcement of constitution must be taller than religion(s) including Islam. Under the aegis of constitution all humans are equals irrespective of religion, caste, creed, color or any thing. Muslims can't practice certain provisions of Islam which are in conflict with the constitution.

"Islam is the  best religion and Muslims are the worst people"